Now, as for that pesky little thing about there being 28 teams in the Round of 32: You’ll notice Lyon and Marseille didn’t participate, seeing as they finished 1-2 in the table and recieved a bye for the next round, where the competition will enter a structured, American-style format akin to the NCAA Basketball tournament.

But now, the matches that took place.

As mentionned above, the big upset of the round was at Chaban-Delmas, where FC Metz, who had recently obtained their first win of the season at the hands of Caen, turned the tables on last year’s winners Bordeaux, and won by two goals to one. Gabriel Obertan opened the scoring for the hosts, only three minutes in, but second-half goals by Barbosa and Gueye changed the scoreboard around. Yum!

Another dramatic come-from behind victory was held at Angers’ Stade Jean-Bouin, a neutral venue for the late affiche of Nantes-Monaco. The Ligue 2 favourites took no prisoners in the first half, scoring two before the match was 35 minutes old, through Claudio Keserü and Marek Heinz. But in the second half, two goals from Brazilian Nené, including a sweet free-kick and a well-set up goal by Serge Gakpé gave the never-say-die Monégasques the victory in the end.

In the last couple of years, Lorient of all clubs, have been Paris Saint-Germain’s annoying little cousin that kicks you in the back of the legs at the semi-annual barbecue. Well, the annoying cousin just got perscribed a dose of ritalin. That’s right, at le Stade du Moustoir, the visitors finally found the key to beating les Merlus, and they did it in convincing fashion, thrashing them 3-0, thanks to two N’Gog goals and a late one from the still-going-strong Pedro Miguel Pauleta.

Go south a few hundred clicks and you’ll find le Stadium in Toulouse, where a wild one took place between Toulouse and the up till then depressed little Stade Malherbe. Tied at two apiece after ninety, Toulouse then went ahead early in the extra-time period, only to see their opponents level in the last minute. And you can only guess what came next: Penalties, which Caen took, 4-2.

Let’s not forget one of the most anticipated matches of the calendar, a bonus edition of le Derby du Nord, pitting Lens against Lille at Amiens’ Stade de la Licorne. Only one goal came of it, an ahem*offside*ahem goal, but a beautiful one, from Belgian international Luigi Pieroni.

All the scores:
Nancy 3-0 Boulogne (L2)
Brest (L2) 1-2 Montpellier (L2)
Niort (L2) 3-2 Le Havre (L2)
Auxerre 1-0 Saint-Étienne
Lens 1-0 Lille
Clermont (L2) 0-1 Rennes
Lorient 0-3 PSG
Valenciennes 2-1 Sochaux
Laval (National) 0-1 Le Mans
Bordeaux 1-2 Metz
Toulouse 3-3, 2-4 p.s.o. Caen
Troyes (L2) 0-1 Nice
Strasbourg 0-2 Amiens (L2)
Nantes (L2) 2-3 Monaco

It started off the way expected it to, when on five minutes, Djibril Cissé smashed in Samir Nasri’s how-the-hell-did-he-manage-that cross past Richert, who would turn out to be one of the key players in the match. The only other notable event in the first half was produced by Dagano, five minutes later, when he was a hair away from equalizing when his chip found Carrasso’s crossbar.

In the second half, Richert made up for conceding the early goal with a fine save on Niang on 60 minutes. Minutes later, Dagano also made up for his miss when he took advantage of poor marking and impeccably nudged Jérôme Leroy’s cross past a surprised Carrasso. A tense end of regulation set the stage for extra-time. Dun-dun-dun…

Djibril Cissé wasted no time establishing himself again in extra-time, as he headed in his second of the game on a perfect cross from Maoulida. With Marseille fans euphoric, Karim Ziani had the chance to silence them, but his effort was first saved by Carrasso onto the bar. No worries, though, because with four minutes remaining, Anthony Le Tallec stunned the entire stadium by scoring the fourth of the game, and the fourth from a header. Penalties? I think so.

Ziani. Sure. 1-0 to Sochaux.
Taiwo. Well, duh. 1-1.
Birsa. You know it. Sochaux up again.
Maoulida. Get the hell outta here. Sochaux 2-1 still.
Le Tallec. Gotta love him. 3-1, getting nervous?
Cana. Don’t shoot much, don’t miss much. 3-2 Sochaux.
Leroy. That’s four in a row. 4-2.
Cissé. A “hat-trick” if you bend the rules. 4-3, everything’s still possible.
Bréchet. Souvenir! Misses the net. 4-3 again.
Nasri. All tied up. 4-4!
Brunel. Can’t ask for more. 5-4.
Zubar. Richert is equal. 5-4 final.

SOCHAUX WIN THE COUPE DE FRANCE!

Sochaux, the team that’s always been between fifth and fifteenth, that never impresses anyone, you know what I’m talking about, are finally crowned once again. They will also take part in the UEFA Cup next season.

Said Teddy Richert (translated from French): Marseille is a good team and it wasn’t easy to come back. But from back there, I could tell that we were keeping up, that we were playing football the way we’re used to. We could have came back, we kept going, and finally we got there. Then came the penalties … We believed we could till the end.

All eyes were on the young dragonslayers as they took on yet another mighty opponent. Mind you, Sochaux had quite a number of chances but couldn’t find the back of Romain Crétin’s net. Montceau had a few themselves, but in all fairness, the match was dominated by the Ligue 1 outfit. The dream looked very much alive throughout the match for Montceau. They even brought it to extra time. However, the efficient Sochaliens stopped all hopes of another upset when Sébastien Grax finished some fine work at the top of the box and proceeded to pivot and slam home the opener. Romain Pitau impeccably put away the second to hush the Bourgogne crowd. Sochaux are going to the final.

You’d think that the other match, featuring two top-flight teams would be more of an even contest. You guessed it, it wasn’t. Fabien Barthez and his heir, Cedric Carrasso piled up the saves in the first twenty minutes, before Nantes’ Payet screamed in a shot that shook the post. Five minutes later, Niang missed the unmissable when he could’ve put the ball into the gaping net after Maoulida had offered him the opener on a silver platter but he completely mishit the ball. Half an hour in, however, Franck Ribéry, the dumbass, gained a tiny bit of cred with yours truly with a truly awesome strike. Up one at half-time, Ribéry was subbed, injured. Maoulida finished off Nasri’s hundred miles per hour run to put OM up by two, before Djib Cissé added the third on his own rebound just minutes after being subbed on.

There’s your final, ladies and gents:

Olympique de Marseille vs. FC Sochaux-Montbéliard, 12 May 2007, Stade de France, Saint-Denis.

The meager score of 1-0 is however decieving, as one team dominated almost the whole ninety minutes. No fluke here folks, as that team was Montceau, who even hit the post a few minutes after Christophe Alidor converted a penalty on 79 minutes. Cheered on by 11,634 spectators at Gueugnon’s Stade Jean-Laville, the minots couldn’t believe what they had done when it was all over after three agonizing minutes of added time.

Lens, on the other hand, were in a state of shock.

Said François Gillot, RCL’s coach (Translated from French): Our efforts were insufficient in every sector. Technical, mental… When that’s the way it is, you’ll get trapped. We don’t know what didn’t work, but we do know that nothing worked.

The last time a team of Montceau’s caliber made it this far was in 2000, when Calais went all the way to the grand finale, where they lost, on a last-minute penalty mind you, to Nantes.

The other tiny little thing involved in the quarter-finals were the Bretons of Vannes. Playing on the pitch of Marseille’s formidable Stade Vélodrome, they were fancying their chances of taking advantage of OM’s current Ligue 1 suckin’ streak, which has seen them winless in five. Hey!, snapped every Marseille player. None of that! None of that was right. Mamadou Niang potted a very decent first one after about 150 seconds of play. The two goals that came next were somewhat of a comedy. Florent Talmont, Vannes’ stalwart defender, was called twice for handling the ball in the penalty area, which Maoulida and Cissé converted one after the other. Maoulida provided a nice fourth, and Pagis puffed his ball beyond the goal line for the fifth near the end of the match. Five-nil to OM.

Sochaux and Paris-SG were in charge of the best calibered match of the four. Paris, who are enjoying the start of a revival (they hope) under new head coach Paul Le Guen, had hopes of winning the Coupe for the second straight year to accomplish something in their poor season. Mickaël Isabey, Sochaux’s well-respected veteran captain, volleyed home a majestic first goal past a helpless Micka Landreau to open up the scoring. Dagano cleanly headed in a second thanks to a perfect cross from Isabey. With the hosts two-nil up, PSG were climbing back desperately, and got a small reward when Afolabi redirected Dramé’s cross into his own net fifteen minutes from full-time. Sochaux goes into the semis, to perhaps meet Marseille, who eliminated them in the Round of 16 of the Coupe last year.

Sedan and Nantes, the two crap teams of Ligue 1 this year, were drawn for the quarters in a match sure to impress the players’ mothers and not many more. Sedan, 20th in the table, drew first blood through Pujol, and not more than a minute later, Claudio Keserü drew even for Nantes, 19th in the table. Penalties came, and after not many saves, penalties went when Fabien Barthez dived the right way on Nicolas Marin’s so-so shot before Da Rocha converted to seal the deal and keep Nantes’ cup dreams alive.

The draw for the next round will be Sunday.

Don’t get the wrong impression, at least not from me, they’d have to do nothing short of dying to lose their title this year. Even now, they’re still eleven points clear of the competition. That said, they were seventeen better than second place before the deluge began.

Here’s what happened: On the last day of the first round, Lyon settled for a scoreless draw at home against Monaco. Back from the break three weeks later, they visited Toulouse, where they dropped the match 2-0 to TFC. Next time, they hosted Bordeaux, who stunned the home crowd by beating them 2-1. Playing their second consecutive home game, they ended up drawing against second-last Nice. In between, they travelled to Marseille for a Coupe de France match that would go down as one of the most exciting in the past years. Yep, Lyon lost that one, 2-1. Determined to stop the funk right then and there, they got the idea to play a crap game against lowly Troyes, and lost 1-0.

What is the root of this problem?
-A simple series of coincidences. Lyon is just unlucky.
-Players got too accustomed to doing the cakewalk in Ligue 1.
-Gérard Houllier is not coaching properly.
-Other teams are waking up and showing Lyon that they’re not alone.

Any other hypotheses? What do you think?

Nantes 1-0 (a.e.t.) Lille

Monaco 0-2 Sochaux

Paris Saint-Germain 1-0 Valenciennes

Clermont-Ferrand 1-4 Lens

Marseille 2-1 Lyon
Playing in front of a wealthier crowd than usual, the hometown OM was up against the king of the jungle, currently in one hell of a slump but immensely talented all the same. Cris scored the game’s first goal for the visitors before the clock struck twenty minutes, providing a strange conclusion to Juninho’s free kick. During the rest of the match, Marseille, unequivocably dominating, scared their opponents when Cissé blasted his strike off Coupet’s post on 72 minutes. Pressing and pressing, OM still seemed destined for elimination with five minutes remaining. But what the hell, they figured, and went on to equalize through substitute Mickaël Pagis on 87 minutes, on a fine volley that left Coupet helpless. Three minutes later, the hosts concluded the impossible when the other substitute, Mamadou Niang, who headed home the winner from Beye’s cross. In the end, Marseille’s Stade Vélodrome exploded with exctasy when the ref blew the final whistle, to see Marseille beat Lyon 2-1 in the last 16 of the Coupe de France. Yeah, seriously.

Monaco 0-2 Sochaux
This match pretty much summed up these two sides’ entire seasons so far. Sochaux displayed brilliant offense, and came away with a good result, whereas Monaco was practically invisible and decieved their hometown (or should I say homeprincipality) fans. Sochaux’s totally merited victory started when Pitau netted a most beautiful goal by perfectly blasting the ball into Ruffier’s top right corner. Youth international Anthony Le Tallec was perfectly placed to finish off a great combination from Pichot with a superb header.

Paris Saint-Germain 1-0 Valenciennes
PSG, ever the eyebrow-raisers, continued their quest for their second consecutive Coupe de France at home against Valenciennes, who had beat them in that very stadium not fifteen days earlier. Having not won in eleven league games, Paris’ turn to shine came when in the 55th minute, VAFC’s keeper Penneteau completely screwed up, almost handing the ball directly to Rodriguez’s feet, and the Uruguayan made no mistake and slid in the game’s only goal. Paris-SG, with a little luck, look not too bad going into the quarter-finals, watch out…

Libourne Saint-Seurin (Ligue 2) 1-2 Sedan
Sedan, current lanterne rouge of Ligue 1, had the chance to get something done when they travelled to Ligue 2 strugglers Libourne. Kébé however put the hosts in front just before the interval on a rebound of the “gimme” variety. Not to be outdone, Sedan’s Joseph-Désiré Job notched two goals, fifteen minutes apart, on a defensive miscommunication and on Boutabout’s impressive run. That proved to be enough to see Sedan continue their redeeming process in the Coupe.

Montpellier (Ligue 2) 0-2 (a.e.t.) Vannes (National)
After a scoreless 90 minutes, the two sides headed to extra time to see who would have dragonslaying duties in the quarter-finals. To Montpellier’s chagrin, the amateur club proved to be the mightier, scoring two goals in as many minutes through Le Bouc and Rijilo. It’ll be interesting to see what they can muster in the next round…

Montceau-Les-Mines (CFA) 2-2 (5-4 p.s.o.) Bordeaux
In an other upset, perhaps the most surprising statistically, happened in favor of Tier 4 club Montceau, who ended Bordeaux’s CdF campaign in dramatic fashion. The favourites drew first blood on 25 minutes through Perea. Never giving up, the adorable little amateurs got the unbelieveable equalizer on 90 minutes by Kambou, sending the game into extra time. Wendel scored for Bordeaux after only two minutes of play in the additional period. Before being reduced to ten men, Montceau pulled back thanks to Benhassine. Nothing more would come of that, so the game was decided on penalties. After seeing both teams convert all but one each, Dalmat had the game on the end of his foot, but his shot was saved by the funnily named Crétin. Whodathunkit? Anything can happen with these small clubs…

Clermont (National) 1-4 Lens
Up against potential Ligue 2 residents for next year, Lens had a tall order to carry out, but regardless, they got it done. Seydou Keita got the first on a quick strike on twenty minutes. Cousin provided the second for the nordistes, and Clermont’s Darchy own goaled it to crush all hope of a comeback, before Eric Carrière finished off his impressive run and put the visitors up 4-0. Clermont got the consolation through the same Darchy six minutes later, but I think you can say it didn’t matter.

Nantes 1-0 (a.e.t.) Lille
After a generally uneventful match, which still saw Barthez make a stupendous save off Audel a few minutes before half-time. With the match seemingly going into penalties, substitute Claudio Keserü gave FCNA the unlikely win with a brilliant free kick on 120 minutes. Seems Marseille set a good example in the last round.

You’re probably wondering why the hell OM would pleasantly give away 40, 000 tickets to one of the biggest games of the season. Incredibly, they’re not doing it out of sheer niceness.

The reason is, after a dumbass supporter had the intelligence to throw a small bomb at a volunteer policeman back in October, the league punished Marseille with having to play a match in front of exactly zero spectators.

Heck, thought Marseille’s president Pape Diouf. That’s not what our supporters paid to see!

Sure enough, the club’s staff promised the regulars at Stade Vélodrome that the first Coupe de France match played at home would be free of charge. Unlucky for them, that game turned out to be one that could’ve netted them more money than just any other. Yeah, I’ve heard that some people are ready to pay more than zero euros to see the two biggest clubs in the country play each other in the biggest club stadium.

So on January 31, 2007, expect a merry olde crowde in Marseille to cheer on their side and chant happy-go-lucky chants such as “Aulas, Aulas, va niquer ta mère!”

I’ll let you figure out what that one means by yourself.

But hey, some came close. Like, say, a team from the fifth tier getting the first goal against Lyon. And Niort coming one penalty short of booting Bordeaux out. But nope. Which just means there’s going to be some high-quality matches in the next round.

But this weekend, when Marseille visited Le Mans in the most anticipated match of the round, an intense back-and-forth match that saw three posts, two disallowed goals and a whole lot of gasps, the victors were decided in stoppage time of the second half of extra time. Franck Ribéry’s corner found Mamadou Niang’s head to see OM through after a crazy contest that could have gone either way in the blink of an eye.

The magical, mighty, fearsome, formidable Laon were playing host to some team named Lyon on the same day. And, as you might expect, the home side got the first goal from the world-renowned Kaufmann. But for the surprise of the night, Clerc, Govou and Fred mounted the comeback to see their side through. Props to Laon for giving them a scare that lasted just about six minutes before Lyon equalized.

In the other match that featured two Ligue 1 teams, Monaco coolly eliminated visitors Toulouse, thanks to two impressive goals by Camel Meriem. 2-nil, final score.

Granted, Paris-SG didn’t have the biggest job to do as they hosted Ligue 2’s Gueugnon. But Kalou’s sole goal did the essential, and Paul Le Guen’s first victory as PSG’s coach was an important one as the club’s confidence went up just a bit.

Oh, and just so you know, next round will have MARSEILLE against LYON. Whatever.
Other scores: Amiens (L2) 1-3 Nantes; Calais (CFA) 1-2 Sedan; Sochaux 2-1 Lyon-La Duchère (CFA); Clermont (Nat) 1-0 Rodez (CFA); Bordeaux 3-3 (5-4 pso) Niort (L2); Pontivy (CFA) 0-2 Montceau (CFA); Romorantin (Nat) 1-2 Valenciennes; Orléans (CFA) 1-3 Lens; Montpellier (L2)1-1 (4-2 pso) Nice; Jarville (CFA2) 3-5 Libourne Saint-Seurin (L2); Bois-Guillaume (L2) 1-1 (5-6 pso) Vannes (Nat); Strasbourg (L2) 2-3 Lille;

Amateurs they are, but the Cup seems to have a thing for them. Calais created an unfathomable surprise in 2000 when they won ten straight matches in the CdF, including wins against Lille, Strasbourg and Bordeaux, and lost the final 2-1 against Nantes, who were the powerhouse at the time. Last season, they got to the round of 16, and lost against Nantes again.

AS Lyon-Duchère, the little engine that almost could last go-round, turned heads by offing Strasbourg and Toulouse, and go to the last 16, where they lost against Paris-SG.

Those two got their place in the last 32 this weekend, as Calais kept Ligue 1 outfit Lorient at bay, and breezed past them 2-0. The other Lyon side, beat a less remarkable team, Sannois Saint-Gratien of the third division.

But now to talk about teams that you just may know a little better, I’ll start by saying that the big names are still there. But, as the title of this article suggests, just barely. Lille, Monaco and Paris went through easily against lower-ranked teams, but the two ever big names, Marseille and Lyon, had to work to achieve what they wanted to.

Lyon, visiting CFA’s Bayonne, were of course everyone’s favourite to win by a few dozen goals. But to finally win, they needed an own goal by one of Bayonne’s defenders. A late and great equalizer by the unstoppable Juninho saw them squeak by, 2-1. Phew.

Marseille, heading north to meet Cambrai, also of CFA, had their scare as well. Led by a Cissé goal early on, they were drawn back by a Cambrai free kick in the second half. In extra time, with both fans shivering from the cold and the intensity, OM decided enough was enough, and two more by Cissé and a finish by Maoulida saw Marseille win 4-1. Note: Cissé did get a new hairdo. Sigh.

Next round, being played on the 20th and 21st of January, will feature two Ligue 1 matchups, that being Monaco and Toulouse, and the yummy Le Mans-Marseille. Lyon will welcome CFA2’s Laon to their humble abode, and I just can’t wait to see the result. Paris-SG drew L2’s Gueugnon.

To cap off, I’ll answer Laurie’s INCESSANT and INFURIATING demands for highlights by posting a few here. Sorry, I couldn’t find Lyon. And I’m sure Benzema did just fine.
Libourne Saint-Seurin 4-2 Troyes
Valenciennes 2-1 Caen
A recap of a few games can be seen here
And here is the video of Marseille’s victory in extra-time.

Oh, and Laurie, you know I’m kidding! Your requests are simply adorable!